Mar 30, 2011

Jane Doe

My embarrassingly lame, totally meaningless name for this blog was all about plausible deniability.   I wanted to experiment with having a blog but I didn’t want people to be able to find it or know that it was mine unless I told them.  I had a link to it on my Facebook page for awhile, but I removed it as my friend circle started to include more professional contacts who might not appreciate my trashy mouth and half-formed opinions.  I can’t figure out whether the new normal is having a traceable internet footprint or pretending like I’m in the witness protection program with pseudonyms for my pseudonyms.

Yesterday was strange.  In addition to a lot of other stuff that I really can’t blog about, I was getting emails here and there from both friends and distant acquaintances about the Barry Bonds trial or whatever shenanigans he’s injected up to.  Why?  Because his longtime girlfriend and I have the same name.  Cue the stream of quotes about “our” sex life, “my” testimony about his shriveling nads, and his threats to violently remove “my” breast implants.

Just as I was about to leave work, I checked Twitter and saw that The Bloggess was asking people to PayPal her eleven cents because she needed $1,000 to buy something “incredibly stupid.”  Eleven cents.  What the hell.

I did it, and tossed off a little comment with my payment.  She quoted it on her blog.  I sort of feel like I got a shout-out from the Pope(ess)!

It’s the little things, right?  Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go back to obsessively checking my credit report for evidence of identity theft.


  1. sugarleg likes this.

    and, omg, I forgot to email you to laugh about the Barry Bonds g.f. thing, but have to admit I did think of you, but only for a millisecond, because ew, the shriveling scrote did me in. god he's GROSS!!!

    oh, and I am PRO-internet anonymity as much as possible. stupid interwebs.

  2. I love your blog name. I also tried to make my blog sort of anonymous, but only because I plan to say really tacky things about people who might set my house on fire in the night if they knew who said those things about them. I solved the whole "professional contacts" dilemma by simply not going to work anymore. Haven't figured out how I'm going to pay the bills yet, but I can be as profane as I want to be. It's a good trade-off, I think.

    PS Congrats on the shoutout from The Bloggess. Not so much on the whole Barry Bonds thing. That's just. . . unfortunate.

  3. shug-ah: The whole case which makes the name thing beyond surreal!

    Jodee: Not going to work anymore ... I like this idea lots!

  4. you know kim, when you posted this link on your FB, just for a second, I thought it was all about you (I had no idea whatsoever about that guy and the whole case) But then I thought this could never be you. so I googled that name and the case and saw the other girl and was relieved. I didn't tell you this.... 'cos it was too embarrassing on FB :D
    Hey but I knew it wasn't you even without knowing you.. that's got to say something about your blog right :)


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